The Mystery Tweak Hex of Kirk Cousins
Kirk Cousins · MIN · QB
“Garbage time arrives early for Cousins: 29 points of garbage, scored by the other team.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins Cousins's week
- At 38, Cousins is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
- Cousins sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
87%POTENCY
-15.7PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Cousins, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Justin Jefferson
- Joe Burrow
- Jayden Daniels
- Caleb Williams
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Kirk Cousins in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kirk Cousins is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kirk Cousins actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.