The Checkdown Hex of Kirk Cousins
Kirk Cousins · MIN · QB
“Cousins gets hit on the arm in the first quarter and "plays through it" at 41% accuracy.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Cousins's week
- The play clock hits zero on Cousins four separate times. Five yards. Five yards. Five yards.
- Cousins is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
76%POTENCY
-17.7PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Cousins's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Justin Jefferson
- Joe Burrow
- Jayden Daniels
- Caleb Williams
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Kirk Cousins in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kirk Cousins is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kirk Cousins actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.