The Mystery Tweak Hex of Kirk Cousins
Kirk Cousins · MIN · QB
“Cousins will throw a pick-six, then a safety, then apologize to his offensive line in the post-game presser.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Cousins's week
- Cousins gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Michigan State's biggest rival.
- Cousins is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
75%POTENCY
-12.6PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
Incantation
Cousins, Cousins, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Justin Jefferson
- Joe Burrow
- Jayden Daniels
- Caleb Williams
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Kirk Cousins in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kirk Cousins is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kirk Cousins actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.