The Sideline-Scold Hex of Kirk Cousins
Kirk Cousins · MIN · QB
“The broadcast shows Cousins on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Cousins's week
- Cousins tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.
- At 38, Cousins is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
86%POTENCY
-16.6PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- A single Lions jersey, ironically worn
Incantation
Cousins, Cousins, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Justin Jefferson
- Joe Burrow
- Jayden Daniels
- Caleb Williams
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Kirk Cousins in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kirk Cousins is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kirk Cousins actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.