The Butter-Finger Hex of Matthew Golden
Matthew Golden · GB · WR
“Golden tears an uncatchable ball out of the air and... steps out of bounds. By a toe.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Golden's week
- Golden gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Texas's biggest rival.
- Golden is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
84%POTENCY
-17.5PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A used challenge flag
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Golden, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Josh Jacobs
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Matthew Golden in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Matthew Golden is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Matthew Golden actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.