The Out-of-Bounds Hex of Matthew Golden
Matthew Golden · GB · WR
“Golden does a touchdown dance for a TD that is overturned by review. Slowly. With zoom.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Golden's week
- Golden's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.
- The QB looks at Golden exactly once: a 3-yard out on 3rd-and-9.
72%POTENCY
-9.1PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- Powdered kicker confidence
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
Incantation
Golden, Golden, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Josh Jacobs
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Matthew Golden in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Matthew Golden is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Matthew Golden actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.