The Hamstring Hex of Parker Washington
Parker Washington · JAX · WR
“Washington is the primary read on every play... for the other team's film study.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Washington's week
- Washington is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- Washington does a touchdown dance for a TD that is overturned by review. Slowly. With zoom.
73%POTENCY
-15.1PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- An unused timeout (still warm)
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Washington's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
- Rashee Rice
FAQ
How do I curse Parker Washington in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Parker Washington is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Parker Washington actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.