The Out-of-Bounds Hex of Parker Washington
Parker Washington · JAX · WR
“Washington runs a beautiful route, gets open, and the QB throws it to the other receiver. Who was covered.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Washington's week
- Washington gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
- Washington finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
89%POTENCY
-15.9PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Washington's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
- Rashee Rice
FAQ
How do I curse Parker Washington in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Parker Washington is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Parker Washington actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.