The Inch-Short Hex of Parker Washington
Parker Washington · JAX · WR
“Ref: "Number Washington, that's a flag." Washington: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Washington's week
- Washington finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- Washington gets shadowed by a corner who just signed an extension and needs to prove it.
75%POTENCY
-11PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A single tear from a Bills fan
- A used challenge flag
Incantation
Washington, Washington, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
- Rashee Rice
FAQ
How do I curse Parker Washington in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Parker Washington is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Parker Washington actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.