The Hamstring Hex of Pharaoh Brown
Pharaoh Brown · IND · TE
“Brown lines up as a tackle on 61% of snaps. A beautiful new career for him.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Brown's week
- Brown will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- Brown runs a perfect route, gets wide open, and is ignored in a way that feels personal.
90%POTENCY
-14PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Brown, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jonathan Taylor
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
- Oronde Gadsden
FAQ
How do I curse Pharaoh Brown in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Pharaoh Brown is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Pharaoh Brown actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.