The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Riley Patterson
Riley Patterson · BAL · K
“Patterson's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Patterson's week
- Patterson warms up well and then the snap is bad. The hold is worse. The kick is a prayer.
- Patterson kicks a perfect ball into the end zone... and it is a kickoff. For the other team.
90%POTENCY
-18.9PTS DRAINED
Delete the AppVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Powdered kicker confidence
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
Incantation
Eye of Ravens, tongue of ref,
Bring Ravens down to grief,
Patterson scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Derrick Henry
- Zay Flowers
- Brandon Aubrey
- Mark Andrews
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Ja'Kobi Lane
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Riley Patterson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Riley Patterson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Riley Patterson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.