The Late Scratch Hex of Riley Patterson
Riley Patterson · BAL · K
“The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. Patterson is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Patterson's week
- Coach goes for it on 4th-and-2 every time Patterson trots out. He watches from the bench like a retiree.
- Patterson tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.
76%POTENCY
-14.2PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- A used challenge flag
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Patterson's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
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FAQ
How do I curse Riley Patterson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Riley Patterson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Riley Patterson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.