The Intentional Grounding Hex of Sam Darnold
Sam Darnold · SEA · QB
“Darnold will throw a pick-six, then a safety, then apologize to his offensive line in the post-game presser.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Darnold's week
- Darnold is already "Out" with that quadriceps. The witch only has to push gently.
- Darnold is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.
73%POTENCY
-19.9PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Seahawks locker room
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Darnold drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- Drake Maye
- Joe Burrow
- Jayden Daniels
- Caleb Williams
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Jadarian Price
FAQ
How do I curse Sam Darnold in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam Darnold is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam Darnold actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.