The Garbage-Time Hex of Seattle Seahawks
Seattle Seahawks defense
“The Seahawks defense is "disguising coverages". The disguise is a clown nose. Fully see-through.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Seattle Seahawks defense's week
- The Seahawks defense generates 0 sacks, 0 turnovers and a lot of vibes.
- The Seahawks defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.
74%POTENCY
-9PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Vikings locker room
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Seahawks drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- Jadarian Price
- Sam Darnold
- Zach Charbonnet
- Jason Myers
- AJ Barner
- Rashid Shaheed
- Emanuel Wilson
- Cooper Kupp
- Tory Horton
- Ricky White III
- Nick Kallerup
FAQ
How do I curse Seattle Seahawks defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Seattle Seahawks defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Seattle Seahawks defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.