The Garbage-Time Hex of Seattle Seahawks
Seattle Seahawks defense
“The Seahawks defense is "bend, don't break" and then breaks every single time.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins Seattle Seahawks defense's week
- The Seahawks offense turns it over 4 times in their own territory. The defense is simply tired.
- The Seahawks defense is gashed by a QB who has not thrown a TD all year. His mom is in the stands.
74%POTENCY
-18.4PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Powdered kicker confidence
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
Incantation
Seahawks, Seahawks, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- Jadarian Price
- Sam Darnold
- Zach Charbonnet
- Jason Myers
- AJ Barner
- Rashid Shaheed
- Emanuel Wilson
- Cooper Kupp
- Tory Horton
- Ricky White III
- Nick Kallerup
FAQ
How do I curse Seattle Seahawks defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Seattle Seahawks defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Seattle Seahawks defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.