The Toe-Out-of-Bounds Hex of Woody Marks
Woody Marks · HOU · RB
“Marks tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Marks's week
- Marks goes down with a "tweak" in a game that was already won. Never even needed him.
- Marks finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
74%POTENCY
-9.9PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A used challenge flag
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
Eye of Seahawks, tongue of ref,
Bring Texans down to grief,
Marks scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Woody Marks in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Woody Marks is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Woody Marks actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.