The Kneel-Down Heartbreak Hex of Woody Marks
Woody Marks · HOU · RB
“A backup RB with an unpronounceable name will score twice on 6 carries. He is on nobody's roster.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Marks's week
- Marks will fumble on his first touch and live in the doghouse until the 4th quarter.
- A mysterious flag erases Marks's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
72%POTENCY
-18.7PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Marks drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Woody Marks in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Woody Marks is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Woody Marks actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.