The Out-of-Bounds Hex of Alex Bachman
Alex Bachman · LAR · WR
“Bachman will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Bachman's week
- Bachman is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- Bachman gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
89%POTENCY
-17.6PTS DRAINED
Group Chat FuneralVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Bachman's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Puka Nacua
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- Kyren Williams
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Bachman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Bachman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Bachman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.