The Snap Count Hex of Alex Bachman
Alex Bachman · LAR · WR
“The QB looks at Bachman exactly once: a 3-yard out on 3rd-and-9.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Bachman's week
- Bachman is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- Bachman drops a wide-open touchdown, then celebrates anyway for 40 seconds.
76%POTENCY
-11.9PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- Powdered kicker confidence
- A single Titans jersey, ironically worn
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
Incantation
Eye of Ravens, tongue of ref,
Bring Rams down to grief,
Bachman scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- Kyren Williams
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Bachman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Bachman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Bachman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.