The Bad Spot Hex of Arizona Cardinals
Arizona Cardinals defense
“The Cardinals will give up a touchdown to a tight end who was a high school wrestler. Net -2 points.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Arizona Cardinals defense's week
- The Cardinals defense generates 0 sacks, 0 turnovers and a lot of vibes.
- The Cardinals defense is "bend, don't break" and then breaks every single time.
87%POTENCY
-12.5PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Cardinals's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Trey McBride
- Tyler Allgeier
- Carson Beck
- Chad Ryland
- Tavien Feaster
- Simi Fehoko
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
- Indianapolis Colts
- Seattle Seahawks
FAQ
How do I curse Arizona Cardinals defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Arizona Cardinals defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Arizona Cardinals defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.