The Sunday Night Fade Hex of Arizona Cardinals
Arizona Cardinals defense
“The Cardinals defense is gashed by a QB who has not thrown a TD all year. His mom is in the stands.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Arizona Cardinals defense's week
- The Cardinals defense is "bend, don't break" and then breaks every single time.
- The Cardinals defense generates 0 sacks, 0 turnovers and a lot of vibes.
83%POTENCY
-10PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single Chiefs jersey, ironically worn
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Cardinals's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Trey McBride
- Tyler Allgeier
- Carson Beck
- Chad Ryland
- Tavien Feaster
- Simi Fehoko
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
- Indianapolis Colts
- Seattle Seahawks
FAQ
How do I curse Arizona Cardinals defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Arizona Cardinals defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Arizona Cardinals defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.