The Garbage-Time Hex of Ben VanSumeren
Ben VanSumeren · KC · RB
“VanSumeren scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins VanSumeren's week
- Ref: "Number VanSumeren, that's a flag." VanSumeren: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."
- VanSumeren gets stuffed so hard the broadcast shows a replay in slow motion, from three angles.
74%POTENCY
-11.3PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
VanSumeren drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Ben VanSumeren in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ben VanSumeren is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ben VanSumeren actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.