The Goal-Line Vulture Hex of Ben VanSumeren
Ben VanSumeren · KC · RB
“VanSumeren tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins VanSumeren's week
- VanSumeren gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
- VanSumeren gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Michigan State's biggest rival.
73%POTENCY
-16.1PTS DRAINED
Eye-Roll MaterialVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
VanSumeren's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Ben VanSumeren in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ben VanSumeren is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ben VanSumeren actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.