The Fumble Hex of Braelon Allen
Braelon Allen · NYJ · RB
“Allen will fumble on his first touch and live in the doghouse until the 4th quarter.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen gets stuffed so hard the broadcast shows a replay in slow motion, from three angles.
- Ref: "Number Allen, that's a flag." Allen: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."
89%POTENCY
-11.5PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Allen's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
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- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
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FAQ
How do I curse Braelon Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Braelon Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Braelon Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.