The Stuffed Run Hex of Braelon Allen
Braelon Allen · NYJ · RB
“Allen will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Wisconsin's biggest rival.
- Allen is "listed as the lead back" and then watches a 3-man committee eat his lunch.
90%POTENCY
-16.3PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Allen drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Braelon Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Braelon Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Braelon Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.