The Late Scratch Hex of Braelon Allen
Braelon Allen · NYJ · RB
“Allen's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen gets the ball 4 times inside the 10. The pylon, however, is fine.
- Allen is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
74%POTENCY
-15.9PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Patriots locker room
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Allen, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Braelon Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Braelon Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Braelon Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.