The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Braelon Allen
Braelon Allen · NYJ · RB
“Allen gets the ball 4 times inside the 10. The pylon, however, is fine.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- Allen gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
82%POTENCY
-14.5PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Allen's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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FAQ
How do I curse Braelon Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Braelon Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Braelon Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.