The Hamstring Hex of Braelon Allen
Braelon Allen · NYJ · RB
“Allen will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.” — Madame Waiver Wire
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- A backup RB with an unpronounceable name will score twice on 6 carries. He is on nobody's roster.
- Allen gets 3 yards per carry and one 2-yard catch on a screen. Efficient. In a sad way.
90%POTENCY
-16.2PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A single Bears jersey, ironically worn
Incantation
Eye of Steelers, tongue of ref,
Bring Jets down to grief,
Allen scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Braelon Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Braelon Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Braelon Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.