The Shank Hex of Brandon Aubrey
Brandon Aubrey · DAL · K
“Ref: "Number Aubrey, that's a flag." Aubrey: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Aubrey's week
- Coach goes for it on 4th-and-2 every time Aubrey trots out. He watches from the bench like a retiree.
- Aubrey sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
92%POTENCY
-14.5PTS DRAINED
Delete the AppVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- A used challenge flag
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Aubrey's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- CeeDee Lamb
- George Pickens
- Javonte Williams
- Dak Prescott
- Jake Ferguson
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Brandon Aubrey in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Brandon Aubrey is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Brandon Aubrey actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.