The Late Scratch Hex of Chad Ryland
Chad Ryland · ARI · K
“Ryland gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Maryland's biggest rival.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins Ryland's week
- Ryland finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- Ryland will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
78%POTENCY
-12.9PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Bears locker room
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Ryland drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Trey McBride
- Tyler Allgeier
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
- Harrison Butker
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Chad Ryland in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Chad Ryland is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Chad Ryland actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.