The Hamstring Hex of Cyrus Allen
Cyrus Allen · KC · WR
“Allen is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Rookie Allen gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.
- Allen finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
74%POTENCY
-11.1PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Allen's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Kenneth Walker III
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Cyrus Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Cyrus Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Cyrus Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.