The Hamstring Hex of Dallas Cowboys
Dallas Cowboys defense
“The Cowboys defense is gashed by a QB who has not thrown a TD all year. His mom is in the stands.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Dallas Cowboys defense's week
- The Cowboys defense generates 0 sacks, 0 turnovers and a lot of vibes.
- The Cowboys defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.
90%POTENCY
-17.6PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A used challenge flag
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- Powdered kicker confidence
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Cowboys drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- CeeDee Lamb
- George Pickens
- Javonte Williams
- Dak Prescott
- Brandon Aubrey
- Jake Ferguson
- Kendre Miller
- Ryan Flournoy
- Michael Trigg
- KaVontae Turpin
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Cowboys defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Cowboys defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Cowboys defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.