The Kneel-Down Heartbreak Hex of Dylan Sampson
Dylan Sampson · CLE · RB
“Sampson is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Sampson's week
- Sampson will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.
- Sampson gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
80%POTENCY
-11.3PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- A single Cowboys jersey, ironically worn
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Sampson, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Dylan Sampson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dylan Sampson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dylan Sampson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.