The Garbage-Time Hex of Dylan Sampson
Dylan Sampson · CLE · RB
“Sampson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Tennessee's biggest rival.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Sampson's week
- Sampson loses 11 yards on a toss sweep. The most creative loss of the season.
- Sampson is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
78%POTENCY
-19.5PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- An unused timeout (still warm)
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Sampson's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Dylan Sampson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dylan Sampson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dylan Sampson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.