The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Dylan Sampson
Dylan Sampson · CLE · RB
“Sampson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Tennessee's biggest rival.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Sampson's week
- Sampson gets stuffed so hard the broadcast shows a replay in slow motion, from three angles.
- Sampson gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
92%POTENCY
-13.7PTS DRAINED
Delete the AppVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Sampson drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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FAQ
How do I curse Dylan Sampson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dylan Sampson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dylan Sampson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.