The Inch-Short Hex of Elijah Sarratt
Elijah Sarratt · BAL · WR
“Rookie Sarratt gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Sarratt's week
- A mysterious flag erases Sarratt's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
- Sarratt does a touchdown dance for a TD that is overturned by review. Slowly. With zoom.
78%POTENCY
-12PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Falcons locker room
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Sarratt drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Derrick Henry
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Elijah Sarratt in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Elijah Sarratt is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Elijah Sarratt actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.