The Late Scratch Hex of Jake Bates
Jake Bates · DET · K
“Bates will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Bates will be perfect on extra points and absolutely nothing else.
- Bates is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
80%POTENCY
-17.1PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Bates drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
- Sam LaPorta
- Jared Goff
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.