The Wind Hex of Jake Bates
Jake Bates · DET · K
“Bates hits the upright twice, then the other upright, then somehow the crossbar from the side.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Bates gets one attempt: a 63-yarder into a headwind. Wide left. 0 points. 1 tear.
- Bates is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
82%POTENCY
-12.7PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- Powdered kicker confidence
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Bates's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
- Sam LaPorta
- Jared Goff
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.