The Mystery Tweak Hex of Jake Bates
Jake Bates · DET · K
“Bates warms up well and then the snap is bad. The hold is worse. The kick is a prayer.” — Madame Waiver Wire
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. Bates is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.
- Bates makes a 58-yarder... in pregame. Not counted.
72%POTENCY
-17.7PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
Bates, Bates, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
- Sam LaPorta
- Jared Goff
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.