The Phantom Flag Hex of Jake Bates
Jake Bates · DET · K
“The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. Bates is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Bates attempts a field goal, the holder pulls it back, and gets sacked at the 12. Points: 0. Dignity: also 0.
- Bates is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
78%POTENCY
-12.4PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Bates, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
- Sam LaPorta
- Jared Goff
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.