The Stuffed Run Hex of James Cook III
James Cook III · BUF · RB
“Cook III will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Cook III's week
- Cook III gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Georgia's biggest rival.
- Cook III is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
91%POTENCY
-19.7PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Cook III's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Josh Allen
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse James Cook III in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If James Cook III is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing James Cook III actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.