The Checkdown Hex of Jared Goff
Jared Goff · DET · QB
“Goff will throw for 340 yards and 0 touchdowns. The efficiency of a parking ticket.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Goff's week
- A mysterious flag erases Goff's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
- Goff will scan the entire field, find nobody open, and take a 9-yard sack for his trouble.
85%POTENCY
-14.1PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- Powdered kicker confidence
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
Incantation
Goff, Goff, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Josh Allen
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Drake Maye
- Joe Burrow
- Jayden Daniels
- Caleb Williams
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
FAQ
How do I curse Jared Goff in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jared Goff is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jared Goff actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.