The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Jared Goff
Jared Goff · DET · QB
“Goff will throw for 340 yards and 0 touchdowns. The efficiency of a parking ticket.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Goff's week
- Coach will call 4 straight handoffs inside the 5. For Goff, the end zone is a rumor.
- Goff will scan the entire field, find nobody open, and take a 9-yard sack for his trouble.
80%POTENCY
-17.5PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- A single Commanders jersey, ironically worn
- A used challenge flag
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Goff drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Josh Allen
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Drake Maye
- Joe Burrow
- Caleb Williams
- Jayden Daniels
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
FAQ
How do I curse Jared Goff in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jared Goff is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jared Goff actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.