The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Jared Goff
Jared Goff · DET · QB
“Goff audibles into a play the receivers did not audible into.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Goff's week
- A mysterious flag erases Goff's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
- Goff's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.
84%POTENCY
-18.1PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Goff drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Josh Allen
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Drake Maye
- Joe Burrow
- Caleb Williams
- Jayden Daniels
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
FAQ
How do I curse Jared Goff in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jared Goff is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jared Goff actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.