The Goal-Line Vulture Hex of Jordan James
Jordan James · SF · RB
“James finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins James's week
- The team goes up 21 early and James gets a pat on the head and 4 snaps.
- James will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
87%POTENCY
-12.1PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
James drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
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FAQ
How do I curse Jordan James in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jordan James is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jordan James actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.