The Snap Count Hex of Ka'imi Fairbairn
Ka'imi Fairbairn · HOU · K
“Fairbairn gets 2 attempts, both blocked by someone who is not even tall.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Fairbairn's week
- Fairbairn is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
- Fairbairn gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
74%POTENCY
-16PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Cowboys locker room
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
Eye of Patriots, tongue of ref,
Bring Texans down to grief,
Fairbairn scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Nico Collins
- David Montgomery
- Marvin Harrison Jr.
- Brandon Aubrey
- Dalton Schultz
- C.J. Stroud
- Woody Marks
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
FAQ
How do I curse Ka'imi Fairbairn in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ka'imi Fairbairn is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ka'imi Fairbairn actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.