The Kneel-Down Heartbreak Hex of Keaton Mitchell
Keaton Mitchell · LAC · RB
“Mitchell is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Mitchell's week
- Mitchell is already "Questionable" with that hip. The witch only has to push gently.
- Mitchell is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
81%POTENCY
-14.4PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Mitchell's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Keaton Mitchell in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Keaton Mitchell is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Keaton Mitchell actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.