The Out-of-Bounds Hex of Keenan Allen
Keenan Allen · SF · WR
“Allen does a touchdown dance for a TD that is overturned by review. Slowly. With zoom.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- At 34, Allen is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
- Allen gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of California's biggest rival.
77%POTENCY
-9.6PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Allen drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Keenan Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Keenan Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Keenan Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.