The Out-of-Bounds Hex of Keenan Allen
Keenan Allen · SF · WR
“The QB looks at Allen exactly once: a 3-yard out on 3rd-and-9.” — Madame Waiver Wire
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.
- At 34, Allen is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
87%POTENCY
-13PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Allen, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Keenan Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Keenan Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Keenan Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.