The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Keenan Allen
Keenan Allen · SF · WR
“Allen gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen tears an uncatchable ball out of the air and... steps out of bounds. By a toe.
- Allen finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
80%POTENCY
-12.3PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Lions locker room
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Allen's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Christian McCaffrey
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
FAQ
How do I curse Keenan Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Keenan Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Keenan Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.